Pursued by the past


Recently I was able to get rid of a stalker, no not that kind, it is part of my mind specially my past unhappy memories. Ok maybe the word stalker doesn’t apply here because I was the one who invoked the memories rather than them coming after me on their own.

How did I get rid of them? It is impossible to run away from your own mind but it is possible to step that invisible ledge that frees you from the past even though it will always be there yet you can surpass it not because it over and done with and it is out of your control but because of a conscious effort to move forward, to let go. I think some of us find it hard to do that because we may think that the past defines who we are and without it we lose ourselves. I found out that is not true at all. Who we are as people is not constricted to certain memories, which may have had a profound effect on who we are but letting go of them does not change us now except for dropping a burden that has been holding us down.

I was speaking to a dear sister who helped me try to organize my thoughts better and I told her that I felt like I woke up after a hundred years feeling changed. I know now the reason for this change, I stepped of the ledge. I remember each of these memories but now that is all they are in the back of my mind rather than in front of my eyes keeping me from seeing. Good riddance…al hamdulilah.

Get past your bitter memories….

5 thoughts on “Pursued by the past

  1. MashaAllah, kudos to you! Such steps are amongst the most diffiuclt ones in my opinion.

    Truth really is, they are just memories. They might live in your mind, but they don’t live in your reality.
    What defines us is not simple, we’re all complex. ❤

    I think it's great, I mean, I can just sense the change in you by reading this post! Like a breeze of fresh air, haha! 😀 MashaAllah!

    1. Hope both of you are well insha’Allah. 🙂

      Sis Hikari: Yes you are right they are just memories and I was the one hanging on to them. *shakes head* haha, thanks habibteh 😀

      Sis Alisha: I think even without dwelling on the memory the consequences of the event would have taught us a lesson. The lesson will remain even if we don’t hold on to the memory. Subhan’Allah it is amazing how the brain works like everything has separate slots but all of it connected together at the same time. Thanks dear. 😀


  2. Nice to read a post after quite a long time.
    I have trouble letting go of painful memories too because I feel I’ll lose some important lesson, a lesson that will be clear to me one day only if I hold on to it.
    But I guess the burden that comes with it is not worth that lesson. Maybe, like you said, I can still be a better self without those…

  3. I really enjoyed this piece. I just finished writing in my own blog about the Architecture of memory and discovered your link at the bottom of the page.

    I am so glad I followed it. Your writing is beautiful.

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